And For No Reason
And
For no reason
I start skipping like a child.
And
For no reason
I turn into a leaf
That is carried so high
I kiss the Sun’s mouth
And dissolve.
And
For no reason
A thousand birds
Choose my head for a conference table,
Start passing their
Cups of wine
And their wild songbooks all around.
And
For every reason in existence
I begin to eternally,
To eternally laugh and love!
When I turn into a leaf
And start dancing,
I run to kiss our beautiful Friend
And I dissolve in the Truth
That I Am.
Times are getting the best of me. I thought it would be good to remember things I like to do so that maybe I can start to do them and maybe just maybe I can turn this frown upside down. p.s. From week 2 of the artist’s way.
1) Go to the beach alone and watch the waves crash.
2) Swim.
3) Get my makeup professionally done.
4) Cut out pictures from magazines and make silly collages.
5) Sip on a latte at a cafe.
6) Stay in a hotel.
7) Bake a cake.
8) Buy lipgloss.
9) Eat blueberries.
10) Memorize my favorite poems.
11) Go to the movies alone.
12) Write.
13) Ride the bus or train!
14) Drive. Just drive.
15) Light a candle at church.
16) Have a laughing fit with my mom.
17) Go to dive bars.
18) Curl up and watch films.
19) Dress up for no reason.
20) Clean out my closet! (Yes, I enjoy this activity!)
I’m in week two of the artist’s way, and I have the grooviest accountability partner. I love her the way a surfer loves his/her board. She keeps me grounded as I ride the waves. So this an exercise from week 1 that I haven’t done.
“If you had five five other lives to lead, what would you in each of them?”
1) Study ballet. I’ve always longed to live a life that disciplined. And, I’ve had an affinity for tutus since I was about four years old.
2) Be a counselor at a jail. It’s the most powerful type of rehabilitation.
3) Sing! And then audition for The Voice.
4) Open my own cafe… The Blueberry Cafe — a menu infused with blueberry goodness.
5) Be a waitress. Call me ridiculous, but I’ve always wanted to be a waitress. I’m just petrified of carrying trays of food.
I reblog this as I have strawberries with my coffee… Right this second I don’t have any blueberries. I ate them all yesterday! But this photo make be berry-happy. HA!
(Source: thecolorsofmymind)
My friend and I just thought of a fun summer project… Videos of us exploring Los Angeles.
As someone who is turned on the most by art, I don’t think there is anything wrong or shameful about being in the dark. We need the playfulness of the day as much as the reflectiveness of the night.
The yin and the yang.
And it’s okay to be hurt and break down and yell obscenities at the Universe. It’s okay to be troubled by life. Just as long as you remember that the darkness is there to teach . There is almost an extra specialness about the darkness because it really forces you to find the little glimmer of light shining through your window so you can see yourself, your life and reflect. Tomorrow always becomes a new day. Light is followed by the dark.
Shine on, my friends. Shine on.
When I graduated from business school in 2007, I remember the next hit wonder everyone was talking about was Second Life. I actually took a class centered around that one concept. 2007 wasn’t that long ago and you are saying to yourself, “Second Life, what’s that?!” Facebook, which we really didn’t talk about at all back in 2007, is something you do every day.
It got me thinking not about technology, but about the landscape (a total b-school word, btw) of life these days. In anything, it’s the Wild Wild West. These are scary times, but if you change your perspective, quite exhilarating.
It makes me wonder, “What’s next?!”
For as long as I can remember, I’ve alway wanted to live a rich, full, artistic life. Finally arriving in Los Angeles and working in the industry, my view of art and creativity and self has gotten muddled.
I know my only hope is to heal the artist in me. The one that wants to bring stories and characters to life not to “make” it but because I love nothing more. So in an effort to do the work, make the change and rekindle my hope in life, I’m embarking on The Artists Way. I’ll chronicle the journey as much as possible.
And, so it begins.
People “heal” because creativity is healthy — and practicing it, they find their greater selves. And we are all greater than we can conceive. — Julia Cameron from The Artists Way
“Breakdowns only happen to people who are up to something big…” —
Mick Leavitt
My mentor and friend Mick Leavitt said this to me when I was first getting into producing theatre and writing. I think the same holds true for other areas of life.
-Duane
Breakdowns = Jargon for “problems” or “obstacles”
(via enjoyduane)
“That is why it is so important to let certain things go. To release them. To cut loose. People need to understand that no one is playing marked cards; sometimes we win and sometimes we lose. Don’t expect to get anything back, don’t expect recognition for your efforts, don’t expect your genius to be discovered or your love to be understood. Complete the circle. Not out of pride, inability, or arrogance, but simply because whatever it is no longer fits in your life. Close the door, change the record, clean the house, get rid of the dust. Stop being who you were and become who you are.” —
Paulo Coelho (via nirvikalpa)
“STOP BEING WHO YOU WERE AND BECOME WHO YOU ARE”
(via southernrainsandhurricanes)
(Source: whimsicalele, via indiscriminatemusings)
Dear Los Angeles,
Falling in love with you has been very much like falling in love with the quiestential bad boy. The one I’ve had a crush on since I was a little girl. I remember gazing at your sparkly lights as we’d drive right through you from San Jose to Orange County. My parents warned me, “Sheila, joon, Los Angeles is dirty and busy and the traffic is awful. We’ll take you to Laguna Beach instead. Better for your soul.”
But I swore that someday you would be mine. Now, after all these years, I can finally call you home. You are easy to love with your charming and funny ways. Like how you place a crazy hip hop dancing homeless guy with dreads on the corner of Robertson and Beverly right smack in the middle of everything fancy as he busts his moves to his boom box. Even on a bad day, seeing something that outlandish can make me laugh in my car all the way home. Thank you for those moments. They slightly make up for all the rest.
Then there is parking. I’ve finally learned to control myself and read parking signs and feed the meter like a maniac to avoid your harsh fines ($60 a pop). Between tickets and parking violations, I’m thinking the City of Los Angeles saw about $3500 of my money between 2009-2011. But I’m much wiser in 2012.
Speaking of parking why do you abuse me with tight parking spaces in overcrowded below the ground parking structures where I have to reach in and out for a parking validation ticket? I’m a tiny girl with tiny arms and 95% of the time I have to open my front door and look completely dorky to the car behind me. Is this much fuss really necessary when one is going to Target for some toilet paper?! And the two times I lost my parking validation ticket and parking attendant made me pay $20 even though I was only there for 20 minutes. Inexcusable behavior.
All the parking slaps to the face make me want to hide in my home wearing dark sunglasses as I drink strong liquor drinks and stream Netflix. Which I find myself doing 98% of the time. Replace wine with liquor.
Then you always tell me how fat, ugly and short I am as you parade models around me at the sandwich shop where I like to get my lunch. I mean really, come on, real models at lunchtime?! And, maybe you’re right, I’ll never have that I threw everything together to make it look like I haven’t tried style. I like to match, okay.
But somedays I think I’ve won you over because you see I have my own special flare and talent and passion. Just enough to perhaps get noticed by you. Yet, then you quietly arrange a rare encounter with a 20 something year old who let’s face it can write better than me, act better than me and assist better than me. I’m reminded that in this big big pool, I’m nothing but a tiny tiny fish. What was once talent, now feels like mush.
I’ll be honest, I’ve called home crying to my mom that I want to leave you. That it’s over. That you’ll never love me or notice me or talk to me. She says she’ll support my decision, so I got to bed crying and wake up with puffy eyes and puffy hands from the tears and chips I ate last night. I drink my coffee, look out my balcony, see the Sunset Plaza buildings and can tell you are sorry for hurting me. You do love me. You do believe in me. You do want to see me shine in this dirty gorgeous city. And, just that one glance, makes it all okay again. Makes me want to try again. Makes me fall in love with you all over again.
So until New York or Tuscany calls, let’s you and I keep dancing this dance (sans the parking tickets).
Love,
Sheila
“This is a good sign, having a broken heart. It means we have tried for something.” —
Elizabeth Gilbert (via kari-shma)
Ugh.
Note to Self: Netflix Bridget Jones Diary. 1, 2 and 3. I have an odd feeling I will relate more to it today than I did way back when.
EDIT: No there is not a 3rd… yet.
This drink will be at my wedding. Oh, husband, where art thou?!
Blueberry Cocktail
(via inspired-design)
“The freedom of the world was hers.”